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How Grapes Can Make You a Better Parent

Have you been in a dry, hard patch in the past several months? Do you feel like a grape being crushed underneath stomping feet? And do those feet belong to your kiddos? Do you feel like you are dying on the vine?

Well guess what? I just learned something on my recent trip to Napa Valley, California that may encourage you. (I know I know I shouldn’t rub that in, but I am facing a whole different type of crushing! My heart is being crushed because I am about to become an empty nester! BOTH my kids are leaving at once due to Covid!) Time really does fly by!! So here is what I learned:

I learned that the very best wine is made from grapes that aren’t comfortable. So, if you aren’t comfortable right now, you are becoming a perfect grape.

The grapes living in the best conditions, like moist soil and plenty of water turn into what they call “lazy grapes”.

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I have a feeling there aren’t many “lazy grapes” reading this right now. You are most likely on the path to becoming a fine wine that gets better with harsh conditions and age.

The following six qualities are how to test for wine quality. But they can also teach us something about parenting:

  1. Balance: Harmony and symmetry in your parenting requires that you know how to parent each one of your kids according to their unique strengths.
  2. Intensity: Aromas are strong and defined. Do you feel like a strong parent with well-defined expectations for each child
  3. Clarity: Definition and precision of flavors. You have a general idea who you are and who your children are, but are you experiencing the same negative patterns reoccurring over and over with no precise way of pinpointing the problem
  4. Complexity: Wide array of different flavors and nuances. Kids will act out to show how complex they are. Their actions are saying, “I am different from you and my siblings, and I want you to know it!” Do you know how to alleviate this problem
  5. Typicity: The wine’s characteristics embody its type and place of origin. Do you have any way to know if your child’s behavior characteristics are normal for their “type”?
  6. Finish: Do sensations persist on your palette? Duration and distance. Do you want to be the parent your child needs right now, but also the parent they will need through every stage of their life?

So pour yourself a glass once the kids are in bed and:

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